Uncertainty in the D

Here it is – the end of law school classes. I’m not jumping the gun here because 5 finals still stand between me and graduation, but at the end of this seemingly long, sleep-deprived journey, I had to post something new. Uncertainty. Unless you have a knack for predicting the future, I’m sure you’ve faced this before. And for me, well, I let myself worry a bit too much about this. You can’t plan life; and often when you do, life usually laughs right back at you and throws a nice curve ball to mix up your plan. So naturally, I give you my next blog entry – Uncertainty in the D. I hope you enjoy it.

And above all, watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you, because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places. Those who don’t believe in magic will never find it.

Unlike most, if not all, of my previous posts, I’ll devote a little more of this one to law school, simply because it is finally coming to an end. First, I take you back to late August of 2011. I walked into my Contracts class with Professor Barnhizer. I had read that he had gone to Harvard Law, would kick you out of class if you didn’t know the answer when you were called on, and he sported the craziest looking mustache I’ve ever seen. Holy uncertainty and constant state of fear sitting there. Well, 3 years later, as I sit outside the law building, I’m still alive.. Or at least I think I am. I know that I have somehow perfected the art of doing 6 million things along with law school, but I wouldn’t recommend it (unless you have an addiction to caffeine, making to-do lists, and are morally opposed to naps). Just as I began law school with feelings of uncertainty, those feelings have not only remained with me, but have exponentially increased the closer I have come to being done.

Now, if you’re unaware of the process, I’ll give a quick explanation of the very tedious (and expensive) task of just applying to take the bar exam. It was January of this year - “You should probably start filling out your application for where you’d like to take the July Bar.” Uhhhhh, excuse me? Are you speaking to me? That’s 7 months away. I don’t even know where the girls’ basketball games are this week. So the feelings of uncertainty kicked into high gear. HELP. I battled so much questioning of where I should apply. Where would I be happy? Where would I most likely find a job, and where would I find a job I actually like? Where do I want to live for however many years to come? Do I want to give up coaching? Do I want to be in a new city? Do I want to be on the East Coast? The West Coast? Stay in the Midwest? What about any reciprocity? What about being able to golf? Finding a new Crossfit box? A new place to live? Am I able to move away from my friends and family again? And finally, my biggest question of them all, do I want to look at this as a completely brand new start to the next chapter of my life? SOMEONE JUST TELL ME! Well, as is often the case in life, there were no answers to my questions. Thus, more uncertainty arose.

I venture to say that we all face dilemmas like this in one form or another. New jobs, new cities, new friends, new relationships, leaving old memories behind in order to make new ones. Pursuing bigger and better things for yourself takes courage to face this uncertainty. So to anyone who can relate to this, not just law students, but anyone, I’ll tell you what I continue to try and tell myself – to let life happen. Make your decisions, stick with them, and trust that what you have chosen is best for you. Then hopefully, those feelings of uncertainty will fade away, and the new steps you take in life will bring clarity to the fog that uncertainty can bring. And with that, I have 9 days until law school is done.

Never give up.

The 2014 Crossfit Open ended a few weeks ago. My opinion on that - thank sweet baby Jesus. “Constantly varied.” That’s part of how Crossfit is often described. Well, last I checked, constantly varied is indicative of uncertainty. My Open experience last year compared to this year was quite, for lack of a more clever way to say it, constantly varied. And I’ll be the first to say that the Open got the best of me this year. Disappointment, frustration, sadness - all feelings that lasted the whole stupid month with those five workouts. I tried my best each week, did each WOD twice, worked as hard as my body physically could, and yet.. Nope, not good enough. Those old feelings coming back to haunt me. Uncertainty. I remember walking through the law building one of the weeks, anticipating whatever Castro would reveal the WOD to be that night, and all of a sudden thinking, “NONE OF YOU LAW STUDENTS HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT THE OPEN EVEN IS.” Then again, I did, in fact, induce those feelings of stress from the uncertainty on myself. I have a tendency to do that.

Before the Open even started, I was uncertain of how it would go. Throughout the month, I saw it bring out the best in some people and the worst in others. But I won’t take the negative path discussing this topic, I’ll point out the positives (a new thing I’m trying here). So as I said, the Open did bring out the best in some people. Scores that were posted by individuals I knew on top of the leaderboard were truly impressive, most of whom are now bound for Regionals. They were scores and times that I know I would never be able to hit. I’m really not exaggerating, they were honestly so impressive. These individuals took the uncertainty they knew the Open would ultimately bring, prepared for it every second they could from last year leading up to this year, and overcame it. Whatever WOD was thrown at them, they rose above it. So to you all who did so, I commend you. And, aside from the Open, no matter what uncertainty Crossfit may throw at you, never, ever give up.

Your next shot doesn’t remember your last shot.

One month. One more month until my golf qualifiers start. How do I continue to prepare between now and then? Be ready for the uncertainty of what you cannot control, and be confident about aspects of the game that you can control. Golf is full of uncertainty. In any given tournament, you can’t control where the officials decide to set the pins, what yardage the course will play, what the weather will be like, what the wind will do once you hit the ball, what the strength of the playing field will be like. But what you can do is overcome these obstacles - accept them, and overcome them. Avoid excuses, I hate people who make excuses, and play to whatever strengths you have on that particular day. Golf is a sport where there will be days where every aspect of your game will click – your putts will fall, bounces will be in your favor, your drives will be long and straight, your approach shots will be like lasers at the pins. It is uncertain when those days for you will be, but between us, I sure hope I’ve got some of those coming up next month when these qualifiers start again. And I wish all you golfers that read this the best of luck that you have some of those days soon too. It’s what makes this crazy game worth coming back to for more.

You can change or stay the same. There are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people who have a different point of view. I hope you live a life you’re proud of, and if you’re not, I hope you have the courage to start all over again.

I’ll make this entry relatively shorter than my usual ones (also because, unfortunately, I still do have studying ahead of me). And since I haven’t discussed Detroit yet, it’s about that time. Detroit’s future is uncertain, simple as that. The city itself is making changes, I also won’t deny that; but, it will still be a matter of time until the D can redefine itself. The outcome of these positive movements people are making towards bettering Detroit remains uncertain at this point in time, yet all that we can do is keep moving forward. And, alas, that’s all we can often do in life as well. Just keep moving forward.

I’ll tie religion into this a bit as well. My wonderful friend Marie has told me that all God wants is for you to be the best version of yourself. The decisions we make amidst the unknown should always be based on what will make you a better person, a better version of who you once were. Surround yourself with people who make you better, while also making them better along the way. And with a life that is constantly full of uncertainties, that is all we can do. We may never know the answer to questions we ask. Why did this happen, why did I fail, why did this not work out, why did this friendship or relationship fall apart, why didn’t I make it, why didn’t I get the job, why did I get rejected? Which leads me back to a quote I used before – LET LIFE HAPPEN.

Trust is a huge factor in handling the never-ending uncertainty. So trust that, in the long run, what may trouble you now will work itself out in the future. Trust and faith can be sources of serenity to alleviate the anxiety that uncertainty can bring. And that is what I continue to try and do. So to lighten this up a bit, if there was ever something that will always be certain, it’s that my Red Wings make the Stanley Cup Playoffs. And here my boys are again – 23 years in a row. So bring home that Cup Detroit, it belongs back with us. And that, my friends, I have always been certain about.

Disappear in the D

This post came out of nowhere. I decided a couple weeks ago that I was fed up with the polar vortex sub-zero temperatures and blizzards stopping me from hitting golf balls and hindering me from my weight-vested runs. So I grabbed every piece of Under Armour I own, pulled the old running shoes out before the WOD, and this topic came to mind. Maybe it was the time by myself on my run, maybe it was hearing nothing but my music, or maybe it was just because I was practically frozen at the end of it, but here goes nothing…

Disappearance.  To just be able to slip away, sneak off somewhere, to get rid of all the stress, all the obligations, the responsibilities, the to-do lists, the early alarms, the late working nights, the worries, the anxieties, the doubts, the harshness of reality, all of it, and to just disappear – seems so nice on some days.  In a way, Detroit disappeared for a while, sunk into its own demise of bankruptcy, blight, and the like. But slowly the city is coming out of those shadows… but yet, only after disappearing. So here I am again, relating this topic of disappearance to Detroit and, of course, all of my other usual topics that are important to me.

We live in moments where change is so speeded up that we begin to see the present only when it is already disappearing.

The year before I began law school I decided to put together quite a lengthy photo album of Detroit. It essentially highlighted the good and bad parts of the city. The section of the book that shows the rougher areas illustrates how easy it is to disappear in a city such as ours. Our “urban wasteland” feel makes it simple to sneak away, to slip through the cracks and not be seen; and yet, those were the sections I thought gave our city the most character. What potential hides within those graffiti-filled alleyways, those abandoned buildings? What used to be of those now empty businesses, the homes left to ruin? What stories are left untold, the stories that disappeared with the fall of once-vibrant Detroit? Everyone has their own “story” in life, just like Detroit. You can pick any person out of a crowd and I guarantee they have one to tell. So that idea made me think, what was Detroit’s? But over time, those stories can disappear too, only the memories of which remain, and even those can fade over time as well.

Light in a Dark City is what I titled the book I compiled. Why? Because, when I had decided to create the album, this idea of “light” in the city that you can so easily disappear in was what I searched for, and still search for, in Detroit. So if you find yourself wanting to disappear, take a moment and find glimmers of light in your life, no matter how small, for things may seem less dark than what they originally appeared. Then you can realize that disappearing is not the path to choose. And hopefully Detroit steers clear of that path as well, redefining its strength as a city from its past disappearance.

With every setback comes a chance to come back and rise - a chance to hold nothing back.

We have now officially begun the 2014 Crossfit Open, scores for 14.1 already to be submitted this evening. I imagine that people who are new to this are excited and nervous for their first experience doing the Open. Those who have put endless amounts of time, effort, dedication, and hard work over the past year are anticipating the release of the WODs, and the chance to prove they have what it takes to really make a statement this year. And me, well, I have to admit that some days, the thought of it makes me want to disappear. I’ve tried to say to myself “its just a workout” or “you’re not built like those other girls” or “you fill your life with too much else as it is, ” but in reality, I look at those as excuses. I hate feeling like a failure, feeling inadequate at things, no matter what it is. I hate hearing the excuses of how I’m smaller or I’m still injured or I have a lot going on or whatever else. So at those times, I want to disappear.

I’ve never been that way though. And so I keep at it, trying everyday to push those excuses and those negative voices in my head aside, improve as best I can, just like everyone else, and have fun with it. And not disappear. Why do I do the Open? I’m no Regionals-level athlete, the girls these days could probably one-arm snatch my gangly self. I do it for my Tribe, for Spartan. I do it in that chance that I can help our team. 7 min of max strict muscle-ups? Mmm, no, doubtful. Kettlebell run for time? Absolutely not. But a girl can dream. The Open is a chance to prove to yourself what you can do, how hard you can push yourself, and how far you’ve come. It isn’t a time to hide away, to act invisible, as I’m guilty of doing before. It’s a chance to attack the WODs each week like it’s the last thing you will ever do. So I wish everyone the best of luck. Embrace the pain, and cherish the support that comes with it, because nothing is better than the atmosphere of Open WOD Sundays at Spartan. And don’t go disappearing. Believe that you’ll be better than you were yesterday, and not as good as you will be tomorrow. And I’ll try to do the same.

“You’ve got a choice. You can stop, or you can start - walking right back to where you’ve always been, stand there still, and remember. It was just a moment ago. Time for you to come out of the shadows, time for you to choose. But you ain’t alone, I’m right here with ya. Now play the game, your game, the one that only you were meant to play, the one that was given to you when you came into this world.”

That quote is from one of my all-time favorite movies, The Legend of Bagger Vance, and I could watch that every night on repeat. Disappearing doesn’t always have to be a negative thing. Golf. My game that can’t be won, only played. When I go to the driving range, I go to disappear from the world for an hour, for two hours, for 5 hours, for however long I’m able to be there for. For that length of time, everything else goes away. This sport has always been the one thing that could truly block out everything else going on in my life. Peacefulness amidst constant chaos. Freedom. This game to me is a gift.

If you don’t have a passion for golf it’s difficult to explain what it’s like to be on the starting hole at a tournament, to have your name announced as you approach the tee. Even now, as my name and where I’m from is said, “next on the tee from Detroit, Michigan..” and spectators clap, then the world all of a sudden goes silent and all you see is the fairway ahead of you. I’m a different person in competition than in anything else I do in my life. Some have said when they play their best rounds its similar to sleep-walking while being awake; you’re relaxed, in a trance of some sort, yet full of adrenaline. It’s things like this that make the game so difficult to truly explain. And this is just one of the many reasons why I’ll never be able to give it up. And why I continue to use it as my chance to disappear. And you know what, even when I’m in the hell known as Bar Exam prep, you can still expect to find me disappearing at the range and still playing in my USGA tournaments. And, with that, I’ll cut off my golf nerd talk for now. But seriously everyone, it’s the greatest game there is.

I will never disappear, for forever I’ll be here, whispering,

Morning keep the streets empty for me.

Down by 5. Less than 30 seconds to go in the 4^th quarter. The #3 ranked team in the state playing the #1 ranked team in the state. Mercy makes the greatest comeback I’ve ever seen in basketball to win the Catholic League Championship by 1 at the buzzer. “Never give up.”

As I’ve written before, this is my 4^th year coaching at Mercy. And with this is another chance to disappear. How, may you ask, can a COACH disappear?? Seems a bit like a poor method to be a part of a team.. Well, I disappear in the sense that no one ever knows what part of the state I’m in!  Oh I’m in Lansing, then I’m in Farmington Hills, then I’m in Ann Arbor, then I’m in Flint. People just never know where to find me. To most, if not all, the nearly 500 miles I drive each week while in-season sounds absurd. And, I’ll admit that, ok yes, it is. But it has been more than worth it. The girls I coached at each of the three levels, Freshmen, JV, and Varsity, their supportive families, the outstanding coaching staff and Mercy’s top notch athletic department make it all worth it. Hitting the road to drive to the girls’ practices and games is a “disappearing” I embrace each time. I received a message from one of the parents this year that epitomized why I do this – that her daughter always says to her that she wants to play her best in every game so she can make me proud. Coaches live to hear things like this. Our Mercy basketball family is truly something special. I was proud of being a part of it during high school, and even prouder now as one of the coaches. And as we continue our journey to the state championship, I’ll continue to disappear on the road, only to get to the games and watch the girls do everything but disappear – to show that, you know what, we are the best.

That question, so sad, recurring – what good amid these, oh me, oh life?

That you are here – that life exists and identity,

That the powerful play goes on, and you may contribute a verse.

I thought that this excerpt from Walt Whitman’s poem was a fitting quote to end with – that in life, we all have the ability to make our own impacts, both on our own life experiences and also in the lives of others, to use his words, “contribute a verse.” If you disappear, as I’ve written about today, then those opportunities disappear along with you. Whether you like it or not, life will continue to go on. You never know what positive effects you can have on others, how much even the smallest of acts can touch someone else’s day, week, year, or even entire life. So to everyone reading yet another one of my rants, embrace all the twists and turns life has to offer, don’t chose the path of disappearance. Live passionately, and not in the shadows. And take a trip down to my city sometime to see how it’s beginning to re-emerge as well. Keep on hustlin’ harder, Detroiters.

Started from the Bottom in the D

I hope the title made you start singing that Drake song. Well, now we’re here. As opposed to how I’ve named all of my other posts, I couldn’t think of one word to describe this topic’s relation to Detroit, so instead, I chose a phrase – Started from the Bottom. If any of you try to tell me you haven’t had to do this in one way or another in your lives, I’d tell you you’re probably lying to me. So here it is, the post I finally found time to finish, written in bits and pieces over the last few months, appropriately related to the end of one year, and the beginning of this new one.

There will come a time when you believe everything is finished… yet that, that will be the beginning.

$18.5 billion in debt. 2/3 of residents moving out over the last 60 years. Government corruption. Poverty. Crime. An urban wasteland. These are all ways in which one can describe aspects of Detroit. Yes, I have always been an advocate of promoting the positives of downtown, yet you cannot ignore the broken parts of our city too. A few months ago, Detroit declared bankruptcy, and not only your average everyday declaration of bankruptcy, but the largest filing for bankruptcy in the history of this country. Start from the bottom? Try starting from ROCK bottom. This was a point where our city was forced to stop, take a step back, look at what it had become, and start anew, to fix what had spiraled downward out of control.

After things are a certain way for so long, you start to think that they are normal…

Recently 60 Minutes did a story on Detroit. They pointed out the little things that our city lacks that most other major metropolitan cities may not even think twice about not having – functioning street lights, police forces that are able to promptly respond to 911 calls, a working fire engine hose, a safe place for children to go outside for recess during school. Sometimes it takes outsiders to pull you aside and say, “No, these things aren’t normal!” After 50 years of the city moving backward, it became a question of whether the city will ever move forward or if it is ultimately stuck here at the bottom. Can Detroit and the people in it build up from the bottom and redefine themselves as something new?

Well, I believe we already have. You see so much in the news or articles related to our city and the positives going on throughout it. People are almost obsessed with taking pictures or writing about (yes, I’m included in this group) the deserted parts of the city, intrigued by what the city once was, and with what it could become. The atmosphere and energy in Detroit are contagious – an odd sort of love for a broken city, an anxiousness to tap into its potential and see what it can truly be rebuilt as.

I recently ventured down to Comerica Park to watch the Wings-Toronto outdoor alumni game doubleheader. The Grind Line, #19, the Perfect Human, the Russian Five, all hockey legends I grew up watching along with the ones immortalized in the rafters above in Joe Louis Arena – like Mr. Gordie Howe and Ted Lindsay just to name a couple. Besides feeding my inner hockey nerd with the legendary lineup, this entire event was great for our city. I also expect that a vast number of those visiting Michigan for the Winter Classic (which was, hands down, one of the coolest hockey experiences I’ve ever had, walking into the snowy Big House full of 106,000 crazy hockey fans) ventured down to our great city. So besides bringing in revenue (we need to make money too people), these events brought everyone downtown to see how much fun Detroit can be – and allowed them to catch that “contagious” attitude to do good for Detroit.

Detroit has many positives on its horizon. A new mayor with his Transition Detroit plan. All of the work the Illitch family does for the city’s sports teams. All of Dan Gilbert’s work on purchasing and developing the buildings downtown. The publicity that visiting celebs give our city. And so much more. Detroit may be starting from the bottom, but it has a brighter future ahead.

And in the end, all we are left with is a sense of hope – hope that it was all worth it.

Going with my traditional style of blogging, I have to make some comments about golf, Crossfit, coaching, law school, and life in general; it wouldn’t be a complete post if I didn’t.

Golf. Oh golf.. This last summer I competed in my usual USGA national qualifiers. One of the biggest challenges with this game is all on a mental level. When you compete in higher caliber tournaments, you really begin to see how important this part of the game is. My dear friend Jaime even came to caddy for me once, and the first thing she says, never being at a golf tournament at this level, “IT IS SO QUIET OUT HERE, how do you stay calm and focused??” Yes, my tournaments are typically borderline silent, a weird sort of peacefulness around the course that is not peaceful at all, but full of golfers pining for that qualifying spot. And, well, funny story, that’s what I struggled with – the “you’ll never be good enough” voices that seem so loud amidst the quiet. But I still competed, forcing myself to focus on my game, this game that can’t be won, only played. And in all three national qualifiers, I placed as the alternate. Not once, not twice, but all three times. One stroke. Every single qualifier. ONE SINGLE STROKE. Good enough to get on the website, to get my name on the USGA players list, to be on their list to call immediately upon an opening in the national championships. And yet, I wasn’t good enough. I didn’t get any calls. I prepared leading up to the tournaments as if I was going, making hotel reservations, ready to book last minute flights out to the sites around the country, constantly checking my phone. It was a golf season of constant anxiety and frustration, hoping for something to work out, but it never did.

Start from the Bottom. I put my clubs away for a while after that last qualifier, making it to the last two players in a 7-person sudden death playoff and then losing on a ruling call by one of the officials. To say I was furious after that tournament, after that entire summer, would be an understatement. Now, a few months have passed and I’ve begun my practice regimen again. And come this summer, amidst the absolute hell known as preparing for the bar exam, I will compete again. Just can't give it up. And maybe, just maybe, I'll knock that one stroke off my scores.

And from the darkness comes glimmers of hope, small at first, yet growing with time.

Crossfit. Where do I even start with this topic.. It seems like everyone is “chugging the Crossfit koolaid” these days. The small box atmosphere I started with seems dead, and the “you’ll never be good enough” voices have been louder than ever. They’ve quieted down lately, but this came with a drastic change in my outlook towards what is, when you really look at it, a workout and nothing more. Yes, you can make it more than that; you can make any sport or activity more than what it is. I’ve done that with golf. And if you have that freedom and talent to do so, I commend you. I really do. Focus on your strengths, but I realized Crossfit is not mine. For so long, I hadn't truly been doing this for myself. I probably won’t ever be able to back squat absurd weight with my long gangly legs or split jerk anything crazy because my baby wrists may shatter. I’ve done this for nearly two years, and it has been an exhausting roller coaster ride most of the time.

Don't everyone get all butthurt now, I still love doing this. And I’ve always been competitive; I’ve prided myself on never settling, on always expecting a lot from myself. However, recently I had to step back and change my entire outlook on Crossfit. I don't really view myself as what you would call a “Regionals level” athlete, and trying to keep up with some of the weights these girls throw around was eating away at me. So instead, I help others where I can. I’ve come a long way from where I started a couple years ago, so now it is important that I give back. A small piece of advice to new athletes or encouragement to our better athletes, or ‘dads’ as I like to call them at Spartan, can sometimes make all the difference. My next blog post will be fully dedicated to my goodbye to Spartan because it has been such a big part of my life, so I’ll leave my more in depth discussion for that. So for now, I start from the bottom. I go to Spartan for the people, for the laughs with Michael, for my life-chats and joking around with Jaime, for spending time with my girls, for watching Dads lift heavy Dad weight, and for the family I found up in Lansing. Oh yeah, occasionally I workout too.

To whom much is given, much is expected.

This is my fourth year coaching basketball at good old Mercy High. Just as I said with Crossfit, you have to give back. All you were given, all you’ve been taught, all that coaches have given you, all of your happy memories, your experiences you’ll never forget - even if it is in small ways, you need to give back. And so I coach. My four years at Mercy were some of my best. My closest friends today are my closest friends from high school. Yes, I commute to Farmington Hills from East Lansing 4 times a week. Yes, the driving to some sounds absurd amidst everything else in my schedule. But my girls have always been worth it. Whether it’s a big win or the hugs hello from the team or the girls complimenting my outfits I wear for our games, it’s impossible not to smile. So where does “Start from the Bottom” come into play? Well, I’ve been blessed with quite the powerhouse teams the past three years. But sometimes, you have to work harder… Nothing truly worth having ever comes easily.

My girls this year are an energetic bunch. Energetic, but also a team that must work hard if they want to succeed. I had to talk with my Jaime at the beginning of a very different season from last year, whose husband runs Grand Ledge’s basketball program, on turning into a “mean” coach. There it was. Start from the Bottom. I hadn’t really had to do this in the past, but sometimes, you need to be yelled at. Repeatedly. Sometimes you need to run more. Sometimes you need to not get playing time because we play to win. Oh, you’re sad about not getting playing time? TOUGH. Work harder and get better. Yes, I have this side, but I still joke around with the girls too. That’s where the memories are made - the hard work, the success, but also the comradery. So always remember to give back. I remind the girls to cherish their time at Mercy, the four years fly by. I likewise tell anyone going on to play basketball in college, or any collegiate sport for that matter, to cherish your four years there, the NCAA only gives you that many. Make the most of the time you’re given; don’t waste it because when it’s gone, it’s gone. And then, sometimes, you start from the bottom again.

There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind.

Oh law school. I’m done in 4 months. The “Fake Law Student” is done in 4 months (apart from the small thing known as the bar exam, of course). Where this time went, I cannot tell you. In less than a year, real life can begin. And, contrary to everything I pictured at the end of my time in EL, it probably will not be in Michigan.

Start from the Bottom. You can’t plan things in life. Sure, you can set them out perfectly in your head, the job, the relationship, the life you imagine as "perfect," but usually then the joke’s on you. I’ve come to find, for me at least, expectations hardly match up to reality. But that’s what we all have to embrace, that we never know what will happen today, tomorrow, in a month, in a year. I’ll come back to Michigan, but for now, its time for a new start in a new city.

Sometimes the most difficult lessons, the hardest challenges, hold the greatest gems of light.

You’re awfully quiet. You aren’t saying much. You look disinterested in life. You look unrecognizably unhappy. Your head is always down. You don’t seem yourself lately. You don’t smile much. You don’t seem like you care anymore. You aren’t the person I used to know.

All of these comments had been said to me over the last 6 months or so by family and friends, and even my old bosses; and I won’t say that any of them were untrue. I allowed that same sense of spiraling downward that our city had experienced to hit me. I went along everyday, avoiding interaction with people at work, overloading my schedule with two legal jobs, giving golf lessons, coaching basketball, law school classes, golf, Crossfit, traveling, doing anything and everything I could to fill some sort of void in my life. I trusted no one. I was bitter and cynical. I expected to be let down. I diminished the good and exemplified the bad. Why look forward to anything when you’d only be disappointed. So at some point, right before my sweet Marie’s wedding in late December, which I was blessed to be standing up in, I was fed up. Enough was enough. Start from the Bottom.

Accept what is, let go of what was, and have faith in what will be.

You hit points in life where you realize you need to change, that you are done with how you react, with who you’ve become, or with your general outlook on things. For me, I had had enough of 2013. I wanted a newer and brighter outlook on things to come. The hope that the future holds something better than what a darker past year held. So for all of you, rather than forming some sort of stupid “I want to lose 3 pounds” resolution, come up with ways to become a better person. Expect more of yourself and less of others. Look to the positives, don’t focus on the negatives. Be thankful for the many things you have, not on those you don’t. Be appreciative. Be sincere. Be humble. Be giving. Be truthful. And above all else, just smile. This is getting a bit away from Detroit, but Detroit has a brighter future in 2014 as well. A city with a resolution to be a better place in the new year.

Detroit isn’t just a national treasure, it IS America. And wherever you may live, you wouldn’t be there and wouldn’t be who you are in the same way – without Detroit.

So I raise my coffee cup now, which was formerly a bottle of champagne, to all of you. 2013 – thank you for the lessons. 2014 – let's go. May you all have a blessed 2014 full of laughter and fun, and most importantly, many trips to the one and only Detroit city.